I am sorry I did not give my children more attention and care and I am so sorry I did not find Steven and ondrea be for his deth

My darling girl, I am sorry that I thought that your life was about me. I'm sorry that I did not let you fail or succeed on your own and suffer or enjoy your own consequences and successes. I'm sorry that you are having to learn these things as a young adult. I am especially sorry for the judgment I still feel in my own heart that I am continuously trying to replace with total acceptance of the person that you are. I am sorry I yelled at you so much as a child. I feel I led you to mistrust yourself by my example. I sincerely apologize and love you with all my heart and soul.

I apologize for what I thought was love which allowed me to stand in the way of danger for so many years. And to participate in it. ' I apologize for not knowing about consequences. I apologize for not getting help early so that I cd have been of service, use and loyal to the only person who cd have loved me. I apologize for going forward and thinking I know what to do and doing everything and ending up in trouble.

Simply and deeply sorry that the split in communication has turned my heart away. I am owning the feelings of unwillingness and resentment I have not allowed to rise because I think I need to be a good person all the time. I have a lot to forgive in myself and have seen others through my own projections. Such sadness to have drifted into this dark place.

Dearest one, please please forgive me and my selfish, childish, immature, impatient harm I have done to you. I will strive in all ways to support you in your way of expanding. I would do anything to take those actions back toward you. I love and adore you more than I ever knew I could. Lamma

I am sorry B for being so abusive to you after you had met someone else. You were not clear whether we were together and I should have clarified. I am happy now. And I hope you are too.

Dearest Ondrea> I am so feeling the connection with Stephen and from his WHO DIES RT NOW> Tears tears, and while we all know we each will die, I'm very sad and very grateful. Please feel my heart to this spacious time of grief. WITH LOVE always patricia Bulitt What a great great teacher... I LOVE YOU

For you on January 17th, marking the 14th year since you have gone on. With the greatest of LOVE from me to you, always. Please always forgive me for not knowing what to do. Please forgive my judgmental attitude towards you. You were right, "don't judge me, just love me'. I had no idea what you were talking about then but I do now. HOPING we will meet again, be together again. I will know what to do. Know your life is so much better now. We all miss you, especially MOM.

I want to apologize and forgive myself for the self abuse I engaged in through an eating disorder due to my history of trauma. Instead of being able to ask for help and confront perpetrators I waged a war on my own body and mind and made my spirit suffer. I want to apologize to my mother and husband and children who sometimes deal with my untreated trauma. Trust is something I am trying to continue healing and trust in myself is a struggle. I want to invite all the healing light and love to myself and feel deserving so I can give this same light to others. I wish all beings peace and love in their hearts.

My dear beloved self,I am sorry for abusing you with alcohol.I feel like a fraud to my loved ones,my friends,my spiritual practice.I am sorry I have not been able to stop and your body and mind have been truly harmed.I will try to hold you with compassion. I can begin anew.

I'm so sad that I didn't listen more deeply to you. I'm sorry for the ways I built walls between us. When I think of moments with you that I cherish most, it's the times you allowed yourself to be vulnerable with me. I miss you and hope you died knowing that I love you and am grateful that you were my mama. I learned so much from you. I wish I could have received your advice and your wisdom more gracefully. RIP. Much love, Deine Nancylein.

i am sorry... for all the miscommunications, non-truths, non-listenings, hostile thoughts, envy and distain... for all the times i spoke not from the heart but from fear and disconnection......... forgive me as i move into greater awakeness... thank you stephen and ondrea for inspiring... thank you ram dass for always setting my compass in the direction of love... thank you for sharing your wisdom stephen, and leaving a wake of awakeness for all of us...... journey onward in peace and i too hope to share in the great soul pod of here, there and everywhere............. love....... still here as you travel onto there... but all as one.... now...... now ..... now........ love

FORGIVE FORGIVE FORGIVE DO NOT WAIT TILL YOU ARE ON YOUR DEATH BED TO FORGIVE DO THIS PRACTICE IF YOU WANT TO DIE IN PEACE THIS IS A KEY TO LIFE ON EVERY LEVEL SELF,FRIENDS,,WORLD FORGIVNESS IS A KEY TO LIFE AND THE NEXT LIFE love to all drea

I am so sorry, beautiful self, that I have so deeply let you down so that you find yourself in the midst of a crisis with homelessness at your door. May I find ways to bring our life back on track. May you forgive me and trust me again to deeply care for us and find a place on this earth where we may feel accepted, safe, free and able to express ourselves fully and receive all that life offers.

On that night, one year ago today, I was acting like I didn’t need you and what I said triggered, hurt and rejected you. Underneath, I was terrified that I was losing you, in every way. I needed you to be close and take care of me and you couldn’t because you needed to protect yourself. Deep down for me, I really believed that I couldn’t be cared for in that way. I haven’t been able to understand your pain because I didn’t understand things about myself. I have been unclear and wrong. I am so sorry…for pushing you away, for leaving you there, for shaming you, not empathizing with you and not understanding your hurt and genuine care. No one has taken care of me that way. I hope that someday you and I can repair that day together. I’m sorry.

To my Dear Children that may have been, Please accept my apologies and deep regret for not birthing you. I was young, but not too young to have children. I was selfish, I did not want my career, my entertainment, or my finances drained from having children I was not READY for. I wanted to be married before I had children, yet I went ahead and slept with your fathers without any thought for the consequences, which were you. Once I had children when I did get married, I realized what a blessing you would have been to me. I did not know, but I love you with all my heart, all my heart, and am very sorry I did not birth you and know you. I have grieved your abortions all of my adult life. Please forgive me. Love, Mom

Please accept my apology for my outrageous temper, for losing faith, and for trying to push buttons in people, which was manipulative. I know that I helped create my own painful problems and I put all the blame on others. They are human and they are responding out of love and hurt, I think. Please forgive me for making things worse. I am separated from my beloved too and I am trying to live out my karma for my own sake and the sake of others.

dear Ondrea, Thank you for sharing Stephen's message to you for your 70th birthday. It is balm for my heart, it speaks of all that has ever made sense to me, the language of the heart, where we are all joined in our waking and our sleeping and where a few fortunate ones live, every day with their beloveds. Thank you and loving thoughts to you on your 70th. x

on my 70 birthday stephen wrote me: an eloquent river flows between us the sky befriends the mountains evening passing clouds cannot obsure we sleep joined at the heart of the matter love and healing to all O&S

I am sorry M for taking advantage of you in our brief relationship in 2006 and for not being more open and vulnerable in your presence. I was in a place of pain and neediness. I ask your forgiveness and send you wishes of lovingkindness.