June 11, 2011 02:50 pm Compassion: 111   

I could write a book of apologies. There are so many apologies that float around in my heart that my chest is often constricted and heavy. But if I were to pull out just a few apologies I would apologize to my sweet and beautiful wife for leaving her to be with another woman. I am so sorry for all the hurt and pain that I have brought onto her. She loved me with all her being and despite our constant fights and lack of a sex life I know that she planned on growing old with me. I am so sorry for leaving my wife alone in our dusty house with the dog and cat. I am sorry for abandoning her for another woman- I know that late at night when she is lying in our bed alone it must be one of the most awful feelings knowing that I am lying in bed with another woman. I am so sorry to my wife's parents who have given me so much. They both woke me up to the bumpy and cracked spiritual path that I am trying to walk on and for this I am so grateful. They both took me into their hearts and gave me so much non-judgmental wisdom and love. I have never had older mentors and to have let them down, betrayed their daughter and lost their place in my life has been such a loss for me and for them. I am so sorry for all the hurt I have caused but I hope that one day they may realize that their daughter and I are better off apart. I tried so hard for eight years to make it work but just could not do it anymore. I am so sorry for giving up. I love my wife so deeply, she was my closest friend and ally and I am so sorry for leaving her alone. What a heart price there is to pay in seeking happiness through leaving a marriage that was not working for another woman. I could of ended it in a wiser, less hurtful way and I am so sorry to myself for not having the insight, self control and wisdom to be more honest and protective of my own heart. I am so sorry to myself for putting my physical body through so much grief and anxiety. I am sorry to especially my heart for not sitting my wife down, talking truth to her, ending the marriage in a loving way and then going towards another woman. I love you J. Please know this. I will never stop loving you, you gave me so much. I did not have the courage to leave without the pull of another woman. I was never planing on this happening but it did and I am so sorry. My apologies could flood on and on but I will stop here since I am starting to feel way too sad.

June 8, 2011 11:34 am Compassion: 114   

I am seeking forgiveness for the numerous times I have found judgement towards my husband when he is just being himself.

June 7, 2011 12:06 pm Compassion: 110   

I just called to make an apology to a cousin from whom I have long been estranged, who I felt had abandoned me, whom I hurt and crowded in the painful time after my mother's death. Her husband answered the phone and told me that she has Altzheimer's, probably wouldn't know me. "Sara, I'm sorry that I kept reminding you of what you said the day we buried Mama. I should have received it as the gift it was and left well enough alone. I'm sorry for whatever else I've done to hurt or anger you. It hurt me that I'd get out of the hospital and you'd ask if I had moved--and that you wouldn't call to ask how I was. I was angry--but when my heart opened a bit, there you were. I wish you access to your own pure heart--and continuing patience and love for your husband."

June 6, 2011 11:17 am Compassion: 114   

I apologize to myself and to my friends and family for my self centeredness and willfull avoidance. I've struggled to come to terms with my pain, my fear, and my anger. Through this struggle I've shut others out and isolated being very hard on myself. I apologize and ask for forgiveness.

June 5, 2011 11:29 am Compassion: 112   

Marce, I am sorry my heart hardened when you were overwhelmed and in so much pain. I was afraid of how much you needed and was afraid that if I was "good," I'd get swallowed up. I was afraid I'd never have room to breathe again. I'm sorry I was angry with you. Please forgive me for everything I was unable or unwilling to do to be with you. I was a afraid, there's a place I'm still afraid. I'm so glad we had that one good night watching NCIS. Thank you for being so good to me.

June 4, 2011 12:02 pm Compassion: 113   

I humbly apologise to my four children for allowing you to be taken from our family. I'm sorry I could not find a way to be available,to show I wanted you always in my life. My sons you have missed any rites of passage and my darling baby girl ... you have grown into a woman remote from any decent relationship to your ever-loving father. I have been too passive and too hidden in my own grief and sense of injustice.I love you always, and have long forgiven your mother for acting the only way she seemed to know how. I try to forgive myself too ... that is challenging. In Lak'ech.

May 29, 2011 01:04 pm Compassion: 115   

Mom I'm sorry that I didnt show all the love and affection that I felt for you. I only wanted the rest of your life to be without the pain and suffering that your entire life had endured. However, even as you were struggling with leukemia these last two years, my job and kids were first. I know you understand that I needed to make sure that I was successful at work since I supported the entire family. But I'm sorry that we didn't do more together and share more joy together. I'm happy that the kids were such a source of happiness for you. I know that you were continuing to live -even through the pain - for them. I'm so sorry that we don't have more videos of you with the kids so they can remember what a great grandmother you were and how much you loved them. I'm so sorry about so many things that I can't even nam, but the biggest one is selfishness. I love you and I miss you. Your daughter Paula

May 27, 2011 01:08 pm Compassion: 116   

I apologize and ask forgiveness for using my husband's death to fuel my rage towards the world. I ask for grace to meet the world in love. It is my sincerest desire to let go and accept Life on Life's terms.

May 24, 2011 09:49 am Compassion: 115   

I apologize for acting out of anger and fear towards my friends and family during seriously painful paranoid periods of time.

May 22, 2011 01:53 pm Compassion: 113   

Terese, may you forgive me for the way I expoited you and hurt you. Erin, may you also forgive me for the way I expoited you and hurt you. To all the women, whom out of my greed, loneliness, fear and ignorance have hurt mentally and emotionally, I ask for forgiveness and apologize with a sincere heart.

May 18, 2011 11:45 am Compassion: 113   

i apologize to myself and others for hating my anger and theirs. i was taught anger was bad. i am bad when i feel and express my anger. others are bad when they express there's. especially my loving husband of 37 years i apologize to you for hating your anger and for hating myself for being angry, destructive and mean. i apologize to my loving parents for hating their anger and being afraid of it.

May 17, 2011 12:00 pm Compassion: 121   

I apologize for beating myself up with enoughness. I am 72 yrs. old and still trying to be smart enough, kind enough, time enough. I survived uterine cancer and still feel I didn't do it well enough. Doing forgiveness meditation, I judge was it enough? Having come close to death was not enough to allow me to feel enough.

May 16, 2011 12:32 pm Compassion: 114   

Dear Mother of mine; I am so sorry that I've hated you so much and for so long. I'm sorry that I have not found a way to reach out to you but instead have allowed you to disown me, have allowed myself to be disowned. I am very very sorry that I hate you. I also love you, bu you have hurt me so much in your behavior toward me for the last 38 years. It hurts so much and it is torture to be estranged from you and to take your rage at me at face value. I know that you love me and hate me. I know that I am innocent, I was the child, you the mother. I would like to be in a loving relationship with you but am so afraid of your hatred of me and your anger toward me, I'm so afraid of the hurt and pain, I am so unsure of how to go about it, yet at times I feel that I am the bigger and the wiser person and I could do something to bridge that gap; I could somehow, some way come to you and show you that I love you, that I honor that you are my mother, that I know you have done your best, that I hurt you by leaving home and moving so far away 33 years ago. I can acknowledge to you that I AM SORRY FOR ANY WAYS THAT I HAVE HURT YOU. I am sorry, but I'm also hurt and angry and afraid. I am so confused about to act or not act, to reach out or not reach out. DEAR LIFE: I apologize for not loving my mother more; for not being successful in a mother-daughter relationship. MOM I"M SORRY.

May 16, 2011 12:08 pm Compassion: 115   

i just read a apology to someones mom.I have the same apology to my mother who never liked me,treated me with aggression.she never gave me a break.i left home at 17 never to return.i tried for many many years to be her friend,but no luck.to the very end of her life no friendship. i do want to apologize for not being the daughter she wanted. i am sorry for any way i was not always friendly because i was fearful of her.i know at times i could have been nicer and i was bitter. i now see that she just didn't have the heart to see me clearly. i wish her well in whatever comes after this life.

May 14, 2011 03:16 pm Compassion: 119   

I am so sorry for covering my self in a blanket of shame, and for being so afraid when I know better. I am sorry for not believing whole heartedly in myself and for hiding. Oh my soul, forgive me and let me remember I am whole.

May 14, 2011 12:50 pm Compassion: 116   

I'm sorry that I am being selfish and am not sharing enough of my gifts with this world. I'm sorry to myself that I often don't show myself as much love as I deserve, that I think horrible things about myself and mistreat and am cruel to myself. I get angry at others who do it but why should they treat me better than I choose to treat myself? I am more worthy of love than I realised, and certainly my own love, and I'm just sorry it took me so long to figure it out.

May 13, 2011 11:58 am Compassion: 116   

i apologize for not to beeing honest to myself. Not to understanding and accepting my feelings of lonelines, hate, jealous and insecurity. I apologize my grey and dark feelings and im sorry for not to remembering that the thoughts are ok. I apologize also that i know the way out and i know the people who i love and who listen to my needs but im forgetting my strenght to be more understanding, more vulnerable and the skill to listen.

May 11, 2011 01:48 pm Compassion: 115   

I apologize to myself for being hard on myself for not having been able do the necessary work I need to do to be able to open my heart to my very abusive and abused oldest brother. While I can find in moments, deep compassion for him, there are many more moments when I am still very angry and hurt by his past and current behavior. I know that in order to stop the cycle I need to be able to forgive him, but I am just not completely there yet. I want to be, but I am not. I don't really know how to get there from here. So I apologize, try to forgive and keep on going. Thank you for this opportunity to clarify this for myself.

May 9, 2011 01:34 pm Compassion: 115   

I apologize for my arrogance, my need to be the one who knows, for not trusting the deeper truth of my true nature, for wasting my time, for not more generously sharing my love and compassion, for seeking comfort instead of responding to distress, for clinging to fear and aversion rather than opening my heart, for turning my back on suffering and maintaining the dualistic split between self and other that maintains a space for pain but also for healing to arise. I apologize for my rage, for my impatience, for my willingness to quit and give up rather than taking the next step into uncertainty. I apologize for losing track of the light even though I know it is truthful and that even a tiny spark is something in the darkness. I apologize for all the hurt I have unskillfully caused to others and myself.

May 7, 2011 12:01 pm Compassion: 114   

I apoloigize to my body for using it as a place where I can exert control. When my life has felt out of control I have eaten too much, put on weight, gotten on diets, taken off weight, and focused my agitation, helplessness, guilt, anger, and other feelings of fear onto my body and it has suffered as a result. Please forgive me, body, and help me to move into a kind and gentle relationship with you.